Tired

For the record, I've only told Ankles, Blondie, Grumps, Effy, Chilli, Prawntip, Eelai, Bendy, Stitch, Quincy, Fur & Daphne about this blog. Oh Monkey and Dotty too. Oh and Trance too cos we were waiting for the Man Utd match to start (GO MY OLIVE-SKIN HERO) and I was really excited about the snails. So essentially I'm just talking to my friends lah.

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What's the appeal about longchamp again?

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Was invited to the industry briefing for H1N1 today (MOH says it's not called H1N1 hor.. it's H1N1-2009 cos years ago there was already H1N1 and the current one is a new strain so the actual name is called Influenza A H1N1-2009 -__-"), and although it's all good (it's slated to move back to Yellow on Monday), I cannot help but feel like I'm in 28 Days Later.

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I believe I have been overtly sensitive and critical these few days, as Grumps had quite impatiently and directly pointed out these two days. I don't know whether to blame it on PMS, the heat or whatever, and I just don't feel like talking. AND MANPUKU SUCKS. My mother is not helping either. I have quite a bit to say about her, but my boyfriend might just pick a quarrel with me again and so I shan't. Hmpf.

But I do have been eating quite a lot again and I actually wept at 17 Again just now, so maybe it really is PMS. There's supposed to be this oral contraceptive that will literally make PMS go away. Perhaps it's gonna be better than EPO.

And I cannot take bitter stuff. It makes the gag reflex go into overdrive and my facial hair stand. Not a pretty sight.

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Popped by Hard Rock just now, and my ex-manager was wearing a hairband over his frizzy hair. Fai Mama remembers me and actually came up to talk. She used to make me tiptoe around her because she looks totally capable of slapping you across the face if you piss her off, but I didn't work under her lah cos I was the host and she was something like head server..

The wagyu was kinda nice, but fell very short of my expectations. Miss Effy WOLFED down her wagyu in less than FIFTEEN minutes, while Chilli and I were talking. When she reluctantly chowed the last bite she had a sheepish smile. It's ok darling I know you needed your cow fix.

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Remember some time ago I actually went lunch with You-Know-Who?

I forgot to blog about it, but I actually felt repulsion. The minute we sat down for lunch, I desperately wanted to leave. I dunno why or what, but I just felt so turned off. The things he said; the things he did. It was so, so juvenile. Then Monkey called me during lunch and cheekily asked me how was it and whether I felt anything. I seriously didn't.

I got annoyed with the things he did, and I cannot even remember what was it that made me so ARGH then. Grumps and I actually had a 24-hr MSN marathon when he was still in Sydney (and I didn't shower during that 24 hrs cos I was so 糜烂 and lam nuah and I spent that day in bed, with a brief stint on the couch. Don't remember eating either). I think I actually saved the convo somewhere but I might have deleted it when I reformatted my hard disk recently. I only know I cringed die when I read some of the stuff I told Grumps that day (and he set a big spider on FIRE with his Kimchi which then EXPLODED).

And then you know about that night when I went to You-Know-What? Same thing. I was there because it was kind of part-obligation-part-respect thing, and every other thing was fine except You-Know-Who-II. I don't know and I don't care what were his intentions - Ankles said he probably was trying to make things feel normal or what. I was playing musical chairs that night. He never seemed to get it even when I am blatantly expressing myself. There's only so much shifting away I can do before I end up sitting on the tarmac. It is particularly frustrating because I am articulate and I can almost always get my point across if I tried (that does not include random outbursts or rants which of course are meant to be incoherent). I used to think maybe it's cos he's not proficient in English, and instinctively whenever I quarrel I do it in English and I use big(ger) words and I talk damn fast. (I also don't know what's the point of this rant, but please indulge me I am PMS-ing.)

Which is why I'm secretly glad that Monkey is such a good sparring partner (Chilli says it's really bad and you should always be "stronger" than your partner). He is a very matter-of-fact person most of the time and he will simply point it out and expose me when he knows I'm being plain unreasonable. He actually acknowledges it ("I know you are just being CB right now") and usually he lets me go on to a certain point before he puts a stop to it (usually by shouting in his pseudo-OZ accent WAHAHAHA - which of course I shout back and then it sometimes end with me throwing the phone into the door like shotput which subsequently cracks to pieces. Sony E is a damn strong phone ok). Forces me to really think through my arguments and so everytime we quarrel, I am thoroughly exhausted. But we always end up getting where either is coming from, and we'll (virtually) kiss and make up.

Ankles asked me some time ago whether I had felt shitty on the day of You-Know-What because of what happened with You-Know-Who-II back then. I don't think I feel guilt about it at all because the whole You-Know-Who started AFTER I was done with You-Know-Who-II, so technically I never did step on two sampans. Perhaps I did feel guilt the first few weeks I was in Sydney, but it was a on-hindsight thing cos I was really busy having fun, getting pissed-high, stuffing my face with fattening-wedges from Quad and quarrelling with Monkey.

I am still rambling and there really is no point of this entry at all. I think I just needed to get it out of the system. So my dear Monkey please don't come and CB me about this entry because it doesn't mean anything at all.

My mother is still being a pain.. but I love my mummy.